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the only DB Cooper theories i accept:
- he died cuz he was an idiot who jumped out of a fucking plane during a rain storm in the middle of the night
- it’s tommy wiseau
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there’s no proof he hit the ground so he could still fall on us at any time
if i could have any superpower it would be to have my teeth be brushed without having to move or even think about it. just every morning and night like clockwork, it’s already done for me.
Another W for shapeshifting gang. I would simply shapeshift into a version of myself with brushed teeth.









